What can men do to help women at home deal with menopause? Doctor shares tips

Published: October 14, 2026 04:26 PM IST

Updated: October 14, 2026 04:35 PM IST

Women navigating menopause or perimenopause can display various levels of anxiety, mood swings and irritability, along with exhaustion.

‘Why are you so irritable these days?’
‘Is everything a problem for you now?’
‘Don’t you think you are overreacting?’
‘God! Is it that time of the month for you?’

If you are asking these questions frequently to women in your life who are 40-plus, it’s time to stop, think and reflect. It’s quite possible that they are struggling with the hormone shifts associated with perimenopause or menopause, and are overwhelmed with what’s happening with their bodies and mental health. Yes, every woman goes through these stages, but that doesn’t make it easier. While the men or youngsters at home can’t share the numerous physical burdens brought in by this transition period – like hot flashes, night sweats, dryness, hair loss, infections or even osteoporosis – they can offer invaluable support in multiple ways. Dr Namitha Susan Joseph, a reproductive and menopause expert based in Kochi, explains how to step up and offer them the right help. 

Start with awareness of the condition
The first step can be educating yourself on what might be changing about the woman in your family. Analyse their symptoms and listen to them as well.

“I had a patient for whom the appointment was booked by her daughter. The patient was a kindergarten teacher  – a profession that demands quite a bit of patience and energy. Apparently, she was just sitting and crying often, for no reason,” the doctor says.

She used to tell her family, ‘I think I have a psychiatric problem,’ the doctor says. “However, her daughter, who knew that their family had no history of the same, did her own research and felt that it might be menopause-related. That’s how we can also help the women in our family,” explains Dr Namitha. 

Try to be patient
Women navigating menopause or perimenopause can display various levels of anxiety, mood swings and irritability, along with exhaustion. Be patient with them and offer the support they require, says Dr Namitha.

Also, understand that intimacy with partners can be tough for them due to vaginal dryness, pain, low libido and associated challenges. Gently encourage them to seek help, rather than dismissing their issues using cliched phrases like ‘Are you hormonal/PMSing,’ when they open up about the difficulties. Only a qualified professional can rightly ascertain whether a woman is going through hormonal or psychological issues and give the right guidance.

“Also, do not tease the women about the regular hormone shifts they are undergoing,” the doctor says. 

If you have never heard of it…
‘We have never heard of such perimenopausal or menopause issues in the past with women in our families. Where did all of this come from, now? Aren’t you making things up?’ This is a question many people who talk, especially about perimenopause, encounter, both from other men and women.

Dr Namitha says, “First of all, our lifestyles aren’t the same as they were a generation ago and therefore, these changes affect our bodies too. Secondly, perimenopausal or menopausal issues widely vary from person to person. Most importantly, one major reason why perimenopause or menopause were never spoken of before was simply limited understanding of the condition.”

If we think back to the past about the same older women who say ‘I never experienced perimenopause,’ probably our minds will remind us of periods when they were really emotional and not quite themselves, says the doctor. “Just that there was a general unfamiliarity with the symptoms or even the fact that something of the sort existed,” she explains. 

Encourage them to consider HRT
HRT, or hormone replacement therapy, can go a long way in helping women handle the perimenopausal and menopausal issues. Find reputable menopause experts who can help with the right diagnosis and treatments, if any. Do not resort to self-treatment or the use of gels or tablets online without consulting an expert. Help the women understand that it’s not them, but something in them that needs change or help.